Tag Archives: great north run

Caught a bolt of lightening….

Some things we don’t appreciate until they are gone.  There is a very significant comedienne that fits this category.  I never really appreciated her when she was alive, maybe it was an age thing? By crikey this old bird was sharp.  Sharp, funny and not afraid to say what she wanted.

Stop for a moment and enjoy this old bird at her finest.

 

 

Yeah I know, not to everyone’s taste but by crikey she makes me laugh.

 

So – my silence. Let me explain.

 

Studying.  Taken over my life so far this year, certainly over the last 2 months or so.  I have been consumed with pushing myself to improve my marine licence and get onto bigger boats with a more acceptable schedule.  So for the last few days I have been in sunny Newcastle to sit what should have been my last two papers of the year.

Newcastle hasn’t been kind to me over the years.  A few years back you may remember I came up here for the Great North Run aiming for a 1 hour 45 min finish time, instead missing out by around 17 minutes.

On the way up on Tuesday afternoon, I triggered a speed camera on the motorway.  I reckon I was doing about 71mph when the gantry suggested only 60mph.  Doesn’t matter that there was sod all on the roads and sod all reason to issue the 60 limit.  I was over.  Amazes me to be able to do 30mph past a school at kicking out time but 70mph on a 4 lane motorway on a bright sunny afternoon when only 2 lanes are busy is a no no.

Yesterday, Newcastle continued to be unkind.  I was served up an exam paper that was an absolute fucker !  I am pretty sure I have not done enough to pass that one. A resit is on the horizon.

Its weird really because Newcastle and the locals are superb.  I have never met such a cannie bunch in all fairness.  As far as accents go, a geordie accent is as sweet and sexy as an East German.

I once worked with a geordie at LeasePlan, Brian Cairnes I think was his name.  He told me once, if you can master these 3 words in Geordie, you can master the whole lingo.  Try it for yourself

Kawasaki

Photocopier

Conjunctivitis

Anyway – I now have a few weeks to either get back to work or sit and wait for my results to come through.  There are a few things I would like to catch up on, including just seeing friends.  I have been so consumed over the last few months that I have seen no-one.

 

Is it just me or are Fire Engines getting smaller?  I was at the birds the other week.  As we pulled up, I could hear a smoke alarm.  I wandered to the bottom of the street and sure enough a house was on fire.  Being fully trained for that sort of shit I checked with the owner that everyone was out then had a cheeky gander myself to see if there was anything I could do.  In all fairness, everyone was out, no pets missing and the back bedroom was well alight so I retreated to the street to pass the info onto the brigade when it arrived.

I could hear the sirens in the distance, I knew the were coming.  Surely they could see the smoke too.  When they arrived – I was shocked.  That engine wasn’t much bigger than my Range Rover.  I also noticed at my local station that they too have one of these smaller units.  Maybe fires are just not as big as they used to be, all these flame retardant modern materials and stuff?

Silence over.  Maybe I will write some really interesting shit this summer.  Maybe I will find something that completely mesmerises me, maybe I will work on my fitness and lose some weight, maybe maybe maybe…….

 

I was reminiscing the other night, the good old days of early Saturday morning starts to be on the break in Cornwall by 9am.  The SRI Vectra dropped on its arse, boards on the roof and The Distillers for company on the 4 hour drive down. Leaning forward as we approached the ‘Welcome to Cornwall’ sign on the motorway then shouting at Mr Richer that ‘I was in Cornwall before you’.

So I guess I should treat you to Ms Brody Dalle………..hot hot hot hot hot.!

 

 

But remember, I am a classic Libran – perfect balance, a yin for the yang, a feng for your shui, a McDonalds for the Burger King.

So lets balance the musical mood with a Dance Classic from back in the day (you can see my previous rants about that phrase further down the page).  I remember this tune with fondness.  I was working in Royal Leamington Spa at the time, and , if I say so myself, it was an insanely buff period of my life – I turned heads even when fully clothed.  I went into a record shop (youngsters ask your parents about those!) and asked for this track by the artist.  So cool was my Mojo that the mofo behind the counter said ‘Who?’

 

Enjoy

 

 

They just don’t make ’em like that any more eh?

So what next I hear you ask?  A summer of indecision I think.  Do I work or wait for my notice of exam failure and get straight back on it?

I will let fate help me with that decision I think.  I have a few chores to catch up on at home, at the birds and the birds’ daughters so surely I can keep busy for a coupe of weeks at least? Hell I might even win the euromillions tonight.

 

But in case I don’t – I have a plan.  If you have a plan, stick to it.

 

 

 


1 little speckled frog

sat on a speckled log

eating some most delicious grubs

YUM YUM

one jumped into the pool

where it was nice and cool

now there are no little speckled frogs!

 

That last line didn’t work as well as I hoped.  If I am honest, I remembered the last line as being about green speckled frogs but that equally ruined the rhythm too.

Oh well.  So a certain Mr. Gove got his testicles handed to him on a plate today – I am very happy about that.  I hold Mr. Gove personally responsible for denying the Great British public the spectacular occasion that would have been Boris Johnson as Prime Minister. Theresa May is a good option, certainly no BoJo but if her bollocks are half as big as Margaret Thatcher’s were – we will be in for a good ride – hold on tight !

Boris Johnson always reminds me of a modern-day Winston Churchill.

 

Last weekend should have seen me running in the Great North 10k but an old war wound was preventing me from entering the battle.  I did email them and tell them I wouldn’t make it so I should get a free entry into next years event.  I have to admit to being secretly gutted about that.  I had a low race number (only 3 digits) and a start in the very 1st wave of public runners – from there, I could have done some serious damage I am sure.  I almost had a tear in my eye as I opened that runners pack with such a low number in it.  Next chance is September for the Great North Run.

As if to add insult to injury, I got a standard issue email from them on Monday telling me how special I was to be part of something so great and to complete the race.

 

Silverstone this weekend, I predict a Rosberg DNF and a Hamilton win. Nico is not a bad chap, it’s just for me, when under pressure, he cracks and makes a mistake whereas Lewis is just more consistent. I hope Jensen Button has a good run too – he is, after all, a thoroughly likeable chap.  Maybe next year Button will get a drive with Williams – then, I predict he will cop off with the ever so sexy Claire Williams and live happily ever after.

What more can I tell you?  I have been exploring the mountains on my bike so expect some new video soon – the down side of that is that whenever I take my GoPro with me, I always feel the need to wear my helmet.  Whenever I wear my helmet – I always crash!

 

Yum Yum


Poetry in Motion

Roses are Red

Violets are Twisted

Bend over love

You’re about to get fisted !!

 

 

It’s all over now bar the racing.  That’s it, done!  Last 10k training run completed this evening in a very shabby 50 minutes (not that my heart thought it was shabby though !!)  Race weight is going to be a whopping 92.2kgs (although tomorrow nights pizza might add a few grams to that) – I was aiming for 89kgs but whats half a stone between friends huh ?

Dress code for the race will be all black with mid blue Brooks Glycerines on my feet, skin coloured nipple plasters which you wont be able to see because 1. they are skin coloured and 2. they will be under my shirt!, a transparent hooded poncho if it is raining, and whichever pair of socks get pulled out of my drawer the day before when I am packing. I will also be wearing a tight pair of briefs to keep my tackle all together and off the floor.

If you need anything else – right now it is probably too late.

I do have one question though – where are Neal Westwood and Verity McCoy – I have nae heard from either of them in a long loch.


Scab Etiquette

I sat on the sofa the other night, peeling off the second scab from my knee (no not a miner from the Thatcher era) after my mountain bike tumble the other week.  As I pulled a section out, I placed it on the sofa next to me so that I could dispose of it properly after getting the rest of it – and that got me wondering.

If you were a guest at someone’s house, would it be ok to pick at a scab?  Clearly if you did, leaving it on the sofa would never be acceptable but there is a time in a scabs life where it gets itchy and it needs a little assistance to break free from its regenerating role of replacing your skin.

What did fascinate me though was the thickness of the damn thing.  When something gets that thick, it needs peeling off, I think they get to a point where they are too thick to do their job.  When you can snap them in half just like a single finger of a Kit Kat then you know it is time to go.

The human body is amazing!

 

 

Which leads me nicely into running again – much to some readers disgust.

 

 

The weekend had me hit a double whammy – two personal bests fell by the wayside.  Saturday morning in Leicester, I ran my fastest 5k there – admittedly it was almost a minute off my best 5k ever but different terrain brings different times right?  The best was yet to come though.  Sunday mornings I have been running half marathons in preparation for this weeks race up north. This sunday, I managed a new PB for a half marathon too – 1 hour 48 minutes.  Curiously this time is slap bang in the middle of my target time and the predicted finish time the race organisers have given me, so the gauntlet is definitely thrown.

Spare a though – on Friday evening I ate a large thin crust double pepperoni pizza from Pizza Hut all to myself – so is it mere coincidence that I then went on to run two new PB’s?

I think it was not coincidence so will be visiting Pizza Hut again this Friday evening.

 

So it’s almost here, watch me on the BBC or track me in real-time as I run by downloading the runkeeper app to your smart phone, tablet or log onto their website and sign up.  Look for the username of hairygoose and add me as a friend.

 

 


Cheeky eBay Bar Stewards

Woe is the generation that believes all that their computer screen puts in front of them.  From social media outlets to the ‘wonderful for stupid people’ eBay.

Last month I tried to sell my Range Rover on eBay.  Unfortunately it didn’t sell.  It did however, attract a lot of wankers.  You know the type – ‘I will give you 10 grand cash by saturday’ or ‘will you take my pikey mobile in part exchange’.  How these feckless idiots actually manage to navigate their way through life baffles me, but then eBay took one step closer to the crown of ‘Wankers of the Universe’  by sending me a mail suggesting I relist it with a 99p start price.  Can you imagine the fucktards that would crawl out of the woodwork for that one?

They also sent me some examples of ‘similar’ cars that had started as a 99p sale and also listed what they actually sold for as an example to tempt me in deeper to their dark web of deceit.  I very quickly took a screen dump of their clever marketing strategy – see how long it takes for you to spot the problem (if it takes you longer than 3 seconds, I recommend you stay far far away from internet sites that can take your money).

 

 

IMG_0464

 

 

Spotted it?  I hope you did, and instantly too.

Actually, thinking about it, selling the same car twice could double my money and potentially mean my next car is ‘for free’.

 

 

On a lighter note, I got my race number for the upcoming Great North Run (Yes Susan, I am talking about running again).  The race takes place on Sunday 13th September and will be live on the BBC.  if you see someone running that looks like me, wearing the number below – there is a very good chance it might be me.  Please therefore wave at your TV screen.

 

IMG_0483

 

 

If my timing is a little out and you see me squatting at the side of the road squeezing one out – DIVERT YOUR EYES!!!!!!

 

 

And Finally

Did you ever make a mistake that pays off?  Last week, I emailed the captain of my current boat asking for a reference as I have found another project of interest.  I accidentally sent the request to the vessel manager rather than the current Captain.

Normally this would have been a disastrous faux pas but in my case, it may have actually done a whole heap of good.  I had been trying to get a committment out of the manager for some time as to how much longer my contract might run – he had never responded but the slip of an email suggesting I might not return to them at the end of the month had him on the phone within 48 hours offering things like a ‘sale’ retainer.  If I stay on and the boat is sold from underneath me, I would get a 3 month salary bonus on top of everything else.  The conversation ended with him asking me to consider what I want to stay on until the end……………………now, what shall I do?


Interim Measure

I just felt the need to share a little something with you so wanted to make a short and sweet post.  I stumbled across this absolute gem of a video this morning on liveleak and it is fair to say, it had me laughing even though I am sick.  It is work safe but does need volume so you can hear what these chaps are saying.

a slap too far ?

Then, what was going to be a very short post, turned into more of a lengthy debate.  I started reading some of the comments on the video and all the guys were finding this video hilarious (and who wouldn’t) but they were also saying that women would not find it amusing as their sense of humour was different, I would say it is more complex.  This then got me to thinking about other male/female differences that makes women’s lives much harder than mens.

The first thing I noticed (as I was tidying my room) was washing clothes.  See, as a man, I can just grab all of my dirty clothes, regardless of origin or colour, bundle them all into one machine, select ‘rapid wash’ leave the temp at 30º and walk away for half an hour.  When it’s finished, bundle that heap of wet rags into the drier and switch it on for 40 minutes – hey presto, all my washing is done in less than an hour and a half and back in its storage facility, awaiting its next outing.

Shoes – no complex decision process here.  Guys only own two pairs of shoes in general and most likely one pair is covered in mud.  If we are going to see our friends or family, the muddy shoes are what those people will be expecting us to be wearing.

Traffic lights – they are either green or red – unless you are a chick.  If its green, it might go red, causing you to stop.  Then you have to decide, eye liner, lippy, hair, eye shadow, blusher etc etc.  If it is already red, you decision process is slightly different based on how much time on red there is left, but it is similar to the green scenario – eye liner, lippy, hair, eye shadow, blusher etc etc but if you really are not sure, then SMS, Facebook, Twatter etc etc. (actually, as Facebook has grown in popularity, it has reduced options for ladies at this point – no-one still uses other social media platforms like Bebo, MySpace, Hi5 and others – so ladies, Facebook is saving you time )

Chocolate – good topic for me.  Can I eat a bar of chocolate? Yes, if I go for a run to offset the calories.  Can a chick do it?  Well first there is the worry, that old saying ‘a moment on the lips, a lifetime on the hips’.  Once they get past that, they figure out a little exercise will burn it off but then a whole decision process is kicked off.  What type of exercise should they do, where should they do it, how long for, what to wear, how much make up to put on, which gym kit is most fashionable at the moment.  By the time a decision is made, it is dark outside and a chick can’t possibly exercise after dark in case the spiders get her!

So it is true, ladies lives are far more complex than men.  There is that old saying too ‘ Women prefer the simpler things in life –  Men!’  Now please don’t let this saying mislead you.  It’s not a preference on their behalf, it is more likely to be envy at our no-nonsense lifestyles.

 

I did warn you it was going to get lengthy.  Now, let’s get back on track……..running.  I am sick as a dog at the moment, real sick, man sick, sicker than any woman has ever been, ever.  So sick in fact that I have not ran all week – that is very sick.  It does though lead me onto the need for a soundtrack for my up and coming Great North Run.  I needed a soundtrack for 1h 45m + a 10m slot of Rihanna at the end as punishment if I was still running/motivation to get across the line.  I came up with a list of songs that was more than 3 hours long.  I have slowly squeezed it down but I am still over time by a good 40 minutes.  The current playlist is below, let me know your thoughts as to what more should be taken out, what more should be added. I will be re-sequencing the tunes listed too, to keep me slow at the beginning, to speed me up when I am flagging and to finish in a giant crescendo of noise and pain.

 

Great North

 

 


Return of the Mac

Don’t be daft – Mark Morrison is not what I am talking about.  My beer damaged Mac is back in my sticky little hands, the Windows Vista laptop will shortly be consigned to the bottom of the cupboard once more.

But enough of that crap, let me tell you about my little jaunt around Gateshead this weekend.  The great North 10k was on my agenda and I was thanking my lucky stars that I was fit enough to run.  On Wednesday, I could hardly walk so imagine my glee at being able to leg it around Gateshead this morning.

There were 200 Gurkhas in the group in front of me, special training, British acclimatization and charity fund-raising all on their agenda – for me, it was a target to aim for – could I catch the Gurkhas even though they had a couple of minutes head start on me?

The course took me past several of Newcastle’s famous land marks including The Millenium Bridge, Sage, Tyne Bridge and along the River Tyne itself, although I never saw Gazza sucking sickly sausage rolls – fog on the Tyne is all mine all mine, fog on the Tyne is all mine – come on !!

Best part of the day?  Catching and passing 2 Gurkhas about 1.5km before the finish line inside the Gateshead International Stadium.

Not sure if I have a new PB or not – I guess I do.  49′ 20” .  My runkeeper tells me I did some 47′ times in Florida last year but they were slightly under 10k – either way, it has to be my best time wearing a numbered bib…..!

 

Back to work this week – I wonder what joys await me.

 

 


Big Brother IS watching you!!

Thought it was an urban myth did you? An Orwell fantasy?  Well no.

A couple of nights ago, I spilt a Belgian beer all over my lovely Mac.  I know what you are thinking, what a waste of good beer – I thought that too.  The other end of that argument is that it also shafted the afore mentioned Mac.  Now, to cut a long story short, I called the Apple store in Birmingham for help.  The automated answering service knew my name and pronounced it well, then asked me if I was calling about the iPhone 6 I purchased in 2014 or the Mac book Pro I purchased in 2010. Getting scary I thought.  Then I realised, the Mac was bought in Sint Maarten and the iPhone in Florida – neither of which required my UK phone number!!!!

Think about that next time you are clicking away happily on Facebook, liking shit that you have no idea of its origin.

Now sadly, I am suffering a very old windows laptop from circa 2009, still back then Windows Vista was all the rage.  My update history suggests I haven’t used it in almost a year and there were 79 updates that I needed to take – my verdict, it is shit.  I will be more careful with my beer in future.

So I left Mallorca on Friday and had a long long drive to Dunkirk.  As I left Palma and headed for Alcudia in the north of the island, I started to enjoy the drive.  I decided to immerse myself in the local culture and found a local Spanish radio station to listen to.  It took me about half a mile to realise that Spanish radio was in fact a load of shit and I found my own music shortly after.

Barcelona was the cluster fuck that I have come to expect from Spain, 8.30 on a Friday evening and it took me nearly two hours to make 4 or 5 miles onto the motorway but when I got free, it was simple cruising all the way.  I really wanted to make the Millau bridge during daylight and stop to take in the sights but time and daylight were not on my side.  Being honest, to make the bridge during daylight was a little ambitious on my behalf.

Needless to say – I made it safe and sound to the shores of blighty where the temperature was nice and cool.  The first weather forecast I saw was warning me of an impending heat wave – something I really couldn’t care for – I was looking for some cool wet weather!

This weekend is Great North Run time – tending to an injury at the moment but wont let that put me off too much – so long as I don’t need to stop for a dump on the way round, I should be ok.  You will fing coverage on the BBC.

 

 


What – no Top Gear ?

Just settling down for a sunday evening in front of the TV, Sunday 8pm, BBC2 Top Gear – but not tonight.  Seems that Jezza has overstepped the mark.  Poor old fella!  Personally, I think he could be a huge premadonna so I can believe all that I am hearing. I do predict that tomorrow though – the news will be full of stories about Mr Clarkson NOT renewing his contract with the beeb.  To really push the boat out, I reckon Hammond and May will stay on and Top Gear will continue with a similar format.  It does get a bit boring watching them smoking tyres out on dream cars, with the predictable punch lines and especially when they ask the audience if they want to see the lap in the  ‘star in a reasonably priced car’ segment – of course they do………..time for a change I think.  Tonight I am sampling a new program called ‘Off their Rockers’.

More toilet talk – I picked up a pack of Belgium’s finest bog roll the other week, all different designs.  One that took my fancy straight away was a roll with a drawing of a pile of poo on alternate sheets (almost mis-spelled that ), underneath the cartoon pile was the word ‘Happens’.  I kinda liked that – ‘Shit Happens’  quite apt for a toilet roll.  Then I noticed another roll had a cartoon face of a Lion (or Cat – I couldn’t tell which) with the words in Portuguese underneath that translated to ‘ Very Nice to see You’.  I thought that was a bit weird, dragging that across your butt hole but then this week I noticed the best yet.  Pictures of hands making shapes that signified letters of the alphabet – I assumed they were sign language but thankfully, under each drawing of a hand was the letter being signed.  I pulled a few sheets off the roll to reveal the full phrase, I-L-O-V-E-Y-O-U  drag that across ring piece of your nearest and dearest to show how much you care.

So recently I have been to-ing and fro-ing from Brussels a lot – late night drives to avoid traffic congestion. Traffic just does my head in and if you plan badly you get traffic on the M25 and also on the RO (the Brussels M25 equivalent) at the other end. Usually this means a 10pm ferry, arriving in Dunkirk at 1am local time followed by a two-hour spurt into Brussels.  The other night I got into some morbid thinking about death on the long run into the ring from Dunkirk.  To perk myself up I started flicking through my iTunes playlist until I found something I really liked.  I found the mighty Biffy Clyro & 27. Singing my heart out I was fully prepared to play it again if it finished before I made it to the house but there was an ace in the pack, a very big ace.

As I approached Stockel Square, Biffy faded out and was replaced by Robbie feckin Williams with ‘Angels’.  It was 3am and I was definitely going to be at the house before this song had finished so I dropped both front windows on the car, pumped up the volume and started singing at the top of my voice.  I had time in hand, that was clear, so I circled the market square 3 times that morning – singing my bollocks off in the most out of tune manner you have ever heard in your life.  Think about the worst karaoke you ever heard – that was me.  It was like holding both middle fingers up to those boring french speaking fuckers of Belgium. IT FELT GOOD!! I hope I woke all of them up.

Friday saw the final chapter in Belgium close as we handed back the house there. I will miss having such a huge forest right on my doorstep but new chapters beckon, new adventures are always just around the corner.  Tonight I went for a run taking in a little amount of road before heading into the fields, aiming for the canal towpath somewhere between Kilsby and Barby.  I did finally make the towpath as the light was fading fast.  I missed a turn halfway down a field and added a good half kilometer to my distance.  My OS maps app didn’t work so I had no choice but to back track and find where I had gone wrong.  Eventually on the tow path, the inevitable happened – I needed a dump !  Now, the non runners amongst you will never understand the link between running and dumping but please be assured there is a legitimate link – I certainly do not have a fetish for dropping a steaming coiler out in the nature – sometimes it just can’t be avoided.  Thankfully this time, I had a packet of Handy Andy’s with me so my underwear and hat were safe.

Staying with running – I did manage a new personal best at Saturday’s Parkrun in Coventry’s War Memorial Park.  I ran my lungs out to take over 45 seconds out of my best time.  I was more than a little miffed though – on the last half of the second lap, two other runners that I correctly guessed were in my age group overtook me.  This is a problem for two reasons.  Firstly, anyone that is older than me or younger than me that is in front of me, is a target. I just can’t be beaten by anyone close by that is older or younger (yes I know that is everyone) but could I catch and pass them before the finish line ? Could I bollocks !  The second reason for this being a problem for me was that as they overtook me – they were having a conversation FFS!  If that is not adding insult to injury, I don’t know what is.  I do wonder though – if they applied my theory of ‘if you have enough air left to talk, you ain’t running hard enough’ – just how fast a time could they make ?  Anyway – I managed a respectable 77th place out of a field of 504 runners but I did get beaten by two chicks, and when I say beaten – I mean given a jolly good arse kicking !

But I keep trying – remember, there are two Great North Runs on my agenda this year.

Next week I return to St Maarten in the Caribbean before setting sail on yet another transatlantic crossing for Mallorca.  Transatlantic crossings are very boring. 16 days or so with not a great deal to do although I always say it’s better to have a boring 16 days than 16 days of fighting for your life.

 


Tripping Twig Syndrome

Plenty of news to share with you this time, I know its been a while since my last post – deal with it !

The Great North Run has seen fit to give me two entries for this years event.  In June, I will be running in the 10k event, come September, I will be in the Half Marathon.  I accidentally upped my distance today in preparation for those events.  I left Rupert’s house in Cawston heading across the fields in the general direction of Draycote Water.  I was told it was 5k around the lake and with the extra bit getting there and coming back, I was expecting a healthy 10k hop.

I stopped for an emergency poo at the club house there, and was a tad bemused to see the runkeeper already at 9.1km.  By the time I was done, it was a 14.7km run or close to 10 miles – turns out that Rupert was talking miles when he said 10, I was thinking in kilometers.

Both of those Great North Runs are televised so be sure to tune in and shout some encouragement at your screen – don’t worry what your neighbours think – better still, get them shouting too.

The bird has accepted a job in England so the last few weeks have been spent finding a pad for her to move to – all done now and the move should be complete by the weekend – now all she needs to do is learn to drive on the right side of the road – the left !!

More details will follow in private dispatches.

Lets talk about twig tripping for a moment.  It’s a new phenomenon for me, which is surprising considering the amount of cross-country work I have done in my life.  Twig tripping happens when one of your feet hits the ground and catches the end of a twig or stick.  Because you have hit the end of the twig, the other end gets lifted up off the floor by a few inches.  This lift coincides with your opposing foot moving forward to take the next step when it meets the uplifted end of the stick, normally around where your shoe laces criss cross at the front of your shoe – then you have a problem, one foot on the ground behind you, the other jammed along side it while you have 5 or 6mph of forward motion.  If you are lucky, the twig doesn’t get tangled in your laces criss cross and your foot can slip around and off the end of the twig and plant firmly with a thud as you recover.  Worse case scenario is the twig gets jammed up in the laces and there is no escape other than face planting.

Not only is it catching me out at the moment, but I have seen others having exactly the same problems – which leads me to believe that there is a new breed of twig with the sole purpose of exterminating the human race by face plant or puddle suffocation

Puddle suffocation is a subject I will cover at a later date.

I was pleasantly surprised to hear a new Prodigy song last week and even more happy to pre-order their album for release later this month.  I was saddened to hear that Zane Lowe is leaving Radio 1 but am extremely curious as to what he is going to be doing at Apple. When I left the UK back in 2004, Zane had just recently started with Radio 1 and was shaking up the establishment and bringing a new breed of music to the airwaves.  I did have a blast on Radio 2 the other week too – Jo Whiley.  I remember listening to Jo way back in the early 90’s when she did the ‘Evening Sessions’ with Steve Lamaq – they were responsible for introducing me to Radio Head and the junkie slut tones of Courtney Love and Hole.

Almost time for Top Gear


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