Tag Archives: iTunes

Aftermath

You remember John Connor?  The man destined to save the world from the rise of the machines? His major purpose in life was to survive Judgement Day and lead the fight against the machines after the Nuclear Holocaust.

I saw him again last night – a little older, a little fatter.  Last time I saw him was in Terminator 2 – Judgement Day.  This guy has a bad habit of working on nuke films where the bombs are dropped – at the moment is survival ratio is 50/50.  Last night, he died, stabbed in the throat by a fat, beardie twat red neck – but in Judgement Day he survived to become a hero – of sorts.

That was the thing about the Terminator – it was way way ahead of its time.  If you don’t believe me, order a pizza, rent all of the movies and sit for a day and watch the lot – back to back.  the original was, I think way back in ’84 ( I can’t be arsed to divert off and check that out but it sounds about right), T2 was a good 10 years in the following, maybe more ( I really can’t be arsed to check that stat out either – but trust me).  Then the others followed but the story is riveting.  Think back to the 80’s.  back in the day, to use a phrase that gets overused by bell ends, back in the day it was a cinematic master piece – much like Donnie Darko in 2001.

It made a storyline that really has come true and will become more relevant as time passes.  Machines that take control of the planet – becoming self aware, realising that the humans who created them are their enemy and should be ‘terminated’.

Do you remember watching The Inbetweeners?  anyone that has suffered the indignity of puberty could relate to just how well that was written.  It’s on a par.

 

There – I don’t know where I was going with that, but that is enough!

 

All said and done, last nights 99p movie rental from the iTunes Store was worth every penny – in fact it was worth a damn site more.  Aftermath – look it up and rent it – I thought it was bloody brilliant !!  I like the iTunes Store for that – sometimes you get complete shite – other times, a blinding gem.  It’s a no loose situation really, it’s only 99p.

Even that film ‘Rubber’ – that was complete bollocks but at 99p – bollocks is no problem right?

 

Now, lets welcome a recent site visitor from Canada.  I don’t know much about them, they didn’t leave a message but maybe they will come back and say Hi sometime soon.  Oh Canada !

 

Moving on to the important stuff – HOLIDAYS !!!

Yes mofo’s, Holidays are coming…..!!!!!  21st March and I hot foot it off the boat.  As I have worked like a mad man for the last 3 months, they have agreed to extend my time off for another week – with no penalty for me – Hurrah for Karma !  After that, two months in Singapore before heading down to Bali for a month or so – Yes Bali….!  I will be taking my dive gear and getting paid while I am there……..S-weet.

It’s about now I would like to sign off and dream about driving the Rangie around some of Warwickshire’s finest country lanes

 

 

Laters


What – no Top Gear ?

Just settling down for a sunday evening in front of the TV, Sunday 8pm, BBC2 Top Gear – but not tonight.  Seems that Jezza has overstepped the mark.  Poor old fella!  Personally, I think he could be a huge premadonna so I can believe all that I am hearing. I do predict that tomorrow though – the news will be full of stories about Mr Clarkson NOT renewing his contract with the beeb.  To really push the boat out, I reckon Hammond and May will stay on and Top Gear will continue with a similar format.  It does get a bit boring watching them smoking tyres out on dream cars, with the predictable punch lines and especially when they ask the audience if they want to see the lap in the  ‘star in a reasonably priced car’ segment – of course they do………..time for a change I think.  Tonight I am sampling a new program called ‘Off their Rockers’.

More toilet talk – I picked up a pack of Belgium’s finest bog roll the other week, all different designs.  One that took my fancy straight away was a roll with a drawing of a pile of poo on alternate sheets (almost mis-spelled that ), underneath the cartoon pile was the word ‘Happens’.  I kinda liked that – ‘Shit Happens’  quite apt for a toilet roll.  Then I noticed another roll had a cartoon face of a Lion (or Cat – I couldn’t tell which) with the words in Portuguese underneath that translated to ‘ Very Nice to see You’.  I thought that was a bit weird, dragging that across your butt hole but then this week I noticed the best yet.  Pictures of hands making shapes that signified letters of the alphabet – I assumed they were sign language but thankfully, under each drawing of a hand was the letter being signed.  I pulled a few sheets off the roll to reveal the full phrase, I-L-O-V-E-Y-O-U  drag that across ring piece of your nearest and dearest to show how much you care.

So recently I have been to-ing and fro-ing from Brussels a lot – late night drives to avoid traffic congestion. Traffic just does my head in and if you plan badly you get traffic on the M25 and also on the RO (the Brussels M25 equivalent) at the other end. Usually this means a 10pm ferry, arriving in Dunkirk at 1am local time followed by a two-hour spurt into Brussels.  The other night I got into some morbid thinking about death on the long run into the ring from Dunkirk.  To perk myself up I started flicking through my iTunes playlist until I found something I really liked.  I found the mighty Biffy Clyro & 27. Singing my heart out I was fully prepared to play it again if it finished before I made it to the house but there was an ace in the pack, a very big ace.

As I approached Stockel Square, Biffy faded out and was replaced by Robbie feckin Williams with ‘Angels’.  It was 3am and I was definitely going to be at the house before this song had finished so I dropped both front windows on the car, pumped up the volume and started singing at the top of my voice.  I had time in hand, that was clear, so I circled the market square 3 times that morning – singing my bollocks off in the most out of tune manner you have ever heard in your life.  Think about the worst karaoke you ever heard – that was me.  It was like holding both middle fingers up to those boring french speaking fuckers of Belgium. IT FELT GOOD!! I hope I woke all of them up.

Friday saw the final chapter in Belgium close as we handed back the house there. I will miss having such a huge forest right on my doorstep but new chapters beckon, new adventures are always just around the corner.  Tonight I went for a run taking in a little amount of road before heading into the fields, aiming for the canal towpath somewhere between Kilsby and Barby.  I did finally make the towpath as the light was fading fast.  I missed a turn halfway down a field and added a good half kilometer to my distance.  My OS maps app didn’t work so I had no choice but to back track and find where I had gone wrong.  Eventually on the tow path, the inevitable happened – I needed a dump !  Now, the non runners amongst you will never understand the link between running and dumping but please be assured there is a legitimate link – I certainly do not have a fetish for dropping a steaming coiler out in the nature – sometimes it just can’t be avoided.  Thankfully this time, I had a packet of Handy Andy’s with me so my underwear and hat were safe.

Staying with running – I did manage a new personal best at Saturday’s Parkrun in Coventry’s War Memorial Park.  I ran my lungs out to take over 45 seconds out of my best time.  I was more than a little miffed though – on the last half of the second lap, two other runners that I correctly guessed were in my age group overtook me.  This is a problem for two reasons.  Firstly, anyone that is older than me or younger than me that is in front of me, is a target. I just can’t be beaten by anyone close by that is older or younger (yes I know that is everyone) but could I catch and pass them before the finish line ? Could I bollocks !  The second reason for this being a problem for me was that as they overtook me – they were having a conversation FFS!  If that is not adding insult to injury, I don’t know what is.  I do wonder though – if they applied my theory of ‘if you have enough air left to talk, you ain’t running hard enough’ – just how fast a time could they make ?  Anyway – I managed a respectable 77th place out of a field of 504 runners but I did get beaten by two chicks, and when I say beaten – I mean given a jolly good arse kicking !

But I keep trying – remember, there are two Great North Runs on my agenda this year.

Next week I return to St Maarten in the Caribbean before setting sail on yet another transatlantic crossing for Mallorca.  Transatlantic crossings are very boring. 16 days or so with not a great deal to do although I always say it’s better to have a boring 16 days than 16 days of fighting for your life.

 


G.S.D.

Did anyone watch the Kasabian gig last night on the iTunes festival?………….man alive, did they rock!  Not to late to watch it if you missed it, but what were you thinking?

Today, I had a hair cut, courtesy of a local Cuban barber – did a damn fine job too I think. So impressed was I, I left him a $4 tip – and if you read my recent post on tipping in the states you will fully understand that this is a good haircut.

New bike is on the way and on Thursday evening, I also managed to take over 2 minutes out of my 16k time round Fort Lauderdale.  I actually think that as autumn comes in and things cool down some more, I can get even more time out of it too.  For those Runkeeper chums – keep an eye on your activities, don’t be falling behind too far – you may never catch up again.

Trip to Boulder in Colorado is now firmly on the cards, flights booked with Delta Airlines.  Let me tell you about Delta Airlines, for a while now, they have been my favourite American Airline but I think they may fall foul soon.  So I found a ticket, $280 return – not too shabby.  I could upgrade to first class for a total of $700 – I decided against it then started reserving my seats with extra leg room because I am a lanky twat. An additional $200 – Crikey, I thought – might just have been better going for the first class ticket after all.  I clicked on purchase, and the web did just that.  When my confirmation came in, seems I managed to purchase my ticket WITHOUT hold baggage – that’s another $25 each way.  So I am within $150 of the first class ticket that would have given me the baggage, priority boarding, free food and drinks and maybe other benefits too.  Problem is, they never told me about the hold luggage at all – the sneaky fuckers.

I hate that – very short sighted.  Lets talk rental cars in Boulder.  Hertz & Avis quote includes full insurance, go to Enterprise and you can only spec the full insurance at collection so you can’t compare prices fully.  So I backed away from Enterprise immediately.  That said, Avis price was almost half of Hertz – what’s going on there?

Either way – I just looked at the weather for Boulder & Colorado in general – first snowfall usually starts in September – might be pretty chilly by the time I get there at the end of October – Might need some warmer gear – something different than the Floridian shirt and shorts. Ooops!

 

Christmas is just around the corner

 


Beardy Twats

Happily cycling along the coast road the other week between Monaco and Italy when I got overtaken by a group of 4 riders on road bikes.  Before you start munching off saying how I have been overtaken, remember, those road bikes are significantly more efficient than a dual suspension mountain bike on knobbly tyres and active suspension.  Never the less, I managed to pass these ‘cyclists’ on 3 occasions.  Sure, they might have been a little faster than me, but they kept stopping for a chat so I would pass them again.  No stamina these youngsters – but they did have fooking great big beards and were fully clad in road race lycra.  I doubt any of them were over 25 years old and they had beards thicker than the hair on my head – the beardy, lycra clad twats !

I did quit my job the other week so I have been off for a week now.  Heading to the States on Monday 5th May, and from there, sailing down to Rio de Janeiro for the world cup.  Once I get there, I swap out with the other engineer and get another month off.  The eagle-eyed amongst you will notice I said ‘sailing down to Rio’ – I am hugely pleased to announce that I am getting back on a sailing boat and plan never to return to a motor boat ever in my life again.  In fact, if you see me taking a job on a motor boat in the future, feel free to bend me over and give me a jolly good and rigorous fisting.

Today something really weird happened.  I was out yogging (that’s how posh people say Jogging!) in the forest.  The forest has really come to life since the last time I was here at the end of March.  The trees are full of leaves, the shrubbery is covering the forest floor again, it’s a real ‘thicket’ of activity.  I entered the forest, yogging at my normal pace, noticing the greenery on the trees and the pine and twigs on the ground. I had my music on but not too loud so I could still hear the background noises, the birds tweeting, twigs snapping under foot, rapists breathing heavily from the bushes, when a song came on.  Have you ever seen the film ‘Apocalypse Now?’.  I had just entered the forest when the Doors started singing ‘The End’.  It was a surreal moment that put me on full gook alert, checking trees for snipers, under bushes for tunnels, behind fallen trees for rows of punji sticks that might catch me out and leave me to bleed to death.  Not to worry, I had a full clip and only two clicks to yomp.

Staying with music for a moment, I had my phone playing music randomly the other day.  Well, I thought it was random, but it soon became apparent that it was scrolling through alphabetically by artist.  I can now officially confirm that I have 7 slightly different versions of Sonique’s ‘It feels so good’ in my iTunes library.  Not a bad running track as a single play item – after the 7th, I was ready to hang myself from a tree.

The Rangie has just cost me 500€ to have an oil leak fixed.  Here’s the thing, the seal itself was just 7€ but by the time the gearbox oil was drained, filters and gaskets replaced, it was a tad more expensive.  I never have liked parting with cash, especially when it is something I have the ability to fix for myself, albeit lacking the equipment to do so – but when I got seated and fired her up, I knew with was a love affair that won’t be ended easily – and certainly not over a 500€ garage bill.  In stark comparison, I just went to the local store for some milk and 2 bottles of Chimay Blue.  3ltrs of milk and 2 Chimays, a tad over 7€ – now that is something I can live with.  Beer, the same price as milk – no wait, let me re-phrase, top quality beer the same price as milk!

My new job awaits, a 46m sloop called ‘Pink Gin’.  I am looking forward to getting on board and getting stuck in.  We did a deal that gives me a minimum of 8 months work a year, the rest of the time is all mine.

And that’s about all I wish to share with you right now – I did negotiate christmas off this year so expect me to be around – annoying the crap out of you all.

 

Charlie Doesn’t Surf !!!!!

 

 

 


Smacking my bitch up

Curious that recent post – it did encourage a lot of new site traffic and even a few new followers.  The only thing I can think of is that there is a lot of bitch smacking going on out there in the world.

For those in the know, I have been in Charleston, South Carolina now for a couple of weeks.  Of course, I have been wanting to write something snazzy but there is close to piss all here for inspiration. Certainly it is a pretty little place, and of course it is a University town.  Many of you, if not all of you will be reading that last statement without fully understanding what it meant – A University Town.  Essentially it means `Clunge Town’, let me translate.  The major population is late teens or early 20´s and all in insanely good shape, all young fillies.  They all favour the skin tight legging style lycra ish thing and better still, the type that goes slightly more transparent when it is stretched (i.e. bending over) so it is eye candy central…………….or is it?

Good to look at may be one thing but as I grow wiser with age I know that even though they are studying hard, there is bugger all between those ears and for me a good brain is as important as a good figure so it becomes one of those bewildering scenarios.

Sitting in Starbucks drinking my skinny latte (it too is an age thing) reading the BBC News on my iphone and looking at all of these scantily clad wenches walking by and honestly not having a great deal of interest at all, in fact more interest as to what is going on in Israel and Gaza.

So that sums up Charleston for you.  Worth a visit?  no , not really, beer like piss water and post offices that don’t open until 11:30am

 

Of course, there is light at the end of the tunnel.  My PTO pumps are now back on, noise and leak free – it took me a while to solve that one but I finally got it.  I also scored a good fix on one of my generators which was half stripped last week to replace the cylinder head gasket and also the wet exhaust manifold gaskets.  I also managed to get the new main engine silencers in to the engine room today but not without spending 3 hours stripping pipes, valves and half a stair case out to make enough room to lift the old ones out – only to find out that there still wasn’t enough room.  3 hours to put everything back together before removing the engine room door frame and some of the banisters to bring them out through the main part of the boat.  Still, tomorrow all i have to do is get them into place and connect them up

I promise soon to have something interesting to write about.  We are leaving for Antigua on 3rd December so fun things should start to happen

 

If you`re having problems I feel bad for you son, I got 99 cookies coz a bitch ate one !

 

 

 

 

Good to read today that AC/DC finally allowed their music to be sold on iTunes

 

 

 

 

 

 


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