Ok, it happened. I offer no apology for my polluting ways because I expect my next car to be a Tesla and also recharged by solar panels so it will make up for any mess I create now.
Rollin’ – in my five point oh
No rag top down so my hair can blow though….
Talking of pimped wheels, look what I spotted at the car wash the other day
Yep – they were jet washing it. I wanted to tell them that electricity and water were generally not a good mix but let them get on with it anyway. I wonder how much he paid – there is no listing on the menu board for mobility scooters.
Now, quick sharp, back to the headline – Sainsbury’s – Giving you less for more. Regular readers would have seen a previous posting about a £12 price difference for an identical item between Tesco and Sainsbury’s the other day. Now, it’s not something I want to bleat on about, I am a Sainsbury’s boy through and through so find this whole episode quite embarrassing. What you are about to see beggars belief really. I can think of no economic example that can explain such tosh.
It’s fair to say I am a bit of a chocolate fiend. ‘What – never’ I hear you cry. ‘How could you possibly be a chocolate fiend and be so buff and studly all the time?’. It’s hard if I am honest but I still manage it.
Anyway – Sainsbury’s – please tell me, how can you sell a 500g packet of chocolate digestives for less than you sell a 300g packet? In the words of Donnie Darko – I am all ears!
That’s all for now, I just wanted to share my confusion. Actually, I am also confused about the amount of new followers my little blog has received this week, all of them latin based names. I was naturally curious and looked at the visitor stats expecting to see some latin countries featuring on the list – but no. I am suspicious and will investigate further.
Until my investigations are complete – should you receive an email from me suggesting I am stuck in Africa after having my wallet and airline ticket stolen and suggesting you transfer some funds to me at the local Western Union branch in Swaziland – Don’t do it.
DO however, feel free to send me chocolate digestives. There is no excuse for buying cheap knock offs either – Only McVitie’s will do and they absofuckinglutely have to be milk chocolate – none of that dark chocolate nonsense – do you hear ?
It could be genius, it could be simply the new purchase – a Range Rover Sport V8 Supercharged. A tad over 500 BHP and fuel consumption that warrants buying shares in BP. You gotta do it though – everyone should have a V8 Supercharged at some stage in their life right?
On the plane up to Aberdeen tonight, I happened across the perfect song to play first on my road trip back south. You will get that at the very bottom of this post – just imagine, as I pull away out of Aberdeen tomorrow morning……. OK, by my standards, Aberdeen to Rugby is nothing more than a quick hop, skip and a jump but every road trip deserves its own play list to see you through.
I found another blinder too, this one you don’t have to wait for though, take a quick look at this beauty. This will be my sunset tune as I get further south.
Maybe the internet raised us – or maybe people are jerks !
So, where have I been you ask? Dah – like you care? Well, a year in Asia under my belt I decided to quit my job and take some time out to study for my next (and last) license. The next one is as high as I can go, Top of the shop – Nine – Oh. February and March will flash by in a blur as I aim to convert my Y License over to an SV licence but also push the size of the boats 6 fold.
January will also see me studying for an Fgas license. What? an Fgas license? WTF? No, its not ‘fart gas’ but does allow me to legally handle refrigerants for air con and fridges etc. I think it will look good on my ever expanding CV.
But enough of that bollocks
Tesco or Sainsbury’s?
Me, I am a Sainsbury boy through and through but I did see something this week that shocked me to my core. I was out looking for printer cartridges for Poopies printer – a modest yet effective HP Envy 5640. A nice wireless little model too I might add. Anyway, a black and colour cartridge I spied in Tesco for £24 – nice little combo. Problem was, Tesco was out of own brand printer paper and by heck I wasn’t paying £5 for a premium ream, sod that! I headed for Sainers so I could refuel with my double nectar points token at the same time.
Good old Sainers, had the ream of paper for just £3.50 – that’s more like it. Just out of curiosity, I browsed the printer cartridges too. Holy crap I nearly shat my pants. The same cartridge combo was £36 !!!!!!!!!! £12 more expensive than Tesco. 12 pence I could deal with but 12 quid – come on.
Out of sheer disgust, I left with my paper, a hole punch and some of those little stick on paper circles to reinforce the punch holes – sod the printer inks, I ordered a pair of XL cartridges on eBay instead and got them the next day.
For the travellers amongst you – and I don’t mean pikies, the travellers that fly – I have a new game for you to try. I have been doing it for a while now. I am still stuck on the name for it, either ‘spot the fuckwit’ or ‘shit your pants’ I can’t decide. Get on a plane, wait for it to start its taxi and then take a good look around. See if you can guess who will be the first to leap out of their seat to go the toilet the very instant that the captain turns off the seat belt signs – its amazing.
It doesn’t end there though – prepare yourself for the re-match. After the pilot has announced the decent and the cabin crew tell you to return to your seats and buckle up, who will be the first dick (or dickette – lets consider equality for a moment) to get up for the toilet when the seat belt signs are turned back on again, even after the cabin crew have said the toilets are now out of service.
I struggle with these fools if I am honest. I once held a poo all the way from L.A. to London and then last year smashed that record with a ‘hold’ all the way from Singapore to London. Why people struggle for 30 minutes is beyond me.
Back to the start. The beginning of the road trip – the song I shall start my journey with is……..
Wait for it. Let me explain the intensity of this song. People talk about bucket lists (OK, yanks talk about bucket lists). They wank on about sky diving, going to the Isle of Man TT, Lion Taming, stabbing a Vicar in the neck, etc etc etc. The bucket list – A list of things you should do before you die (kick the bucket)
Well, all of the items on their bucket list are just plain piffle, twat waffle, a waste of space. If there is one thing, just one thing that should be on everyone’s bucket list – it should be this.
Many years ago while having a night out in Edinburgh, a packed pub, rammed to the rafters, the DJ decided to play this song. The whole place erupted in grand voice so loud, even the walls were shaking, I swear the 4 storey building was swaying with the beat. Scrub your bucket list and put this at the top – to be in a Scottish pub when this is played.
But before you look, let me translate, To Haver = To talk shit.
Lastly, a few hello’s
Mon & John. Bumped into Mon in the TC last week while I was walking along dreaming about a Greggs sausage role and almost missed her, in fact, I did miss her, luckily she spotted me. Lexa – all the way down in South Africa, popping up for the Hugh Cornwell post the other week, Conor – always deserving a mention, my most avid follower, Mr Westwood (and I don’t mean Tim) a surprise meeting at the farm in Cathorpe. Amy Beard for still not buying me coffee and a cake – MINGER ! Steve B for some very good Xbox sessions since I have been home and of course my bird for being spectacularly ace in every aspect.