I am sure it will get here eventually, but for now – check out how well travelled my spare part is.

started in Nice -France, Marseille, Leipzig – Germany, East Midlands – UK, Barbados, Maiquetia – Venezuela, Panama City – Panama, Maiquetia – Venezuela, Port of Spain – Trinidad & Tobago – and now currently residing in Maiquetia – Venezuela once more.

The big question – will it make it to the Dominican Republic before we leave ?

Some things from the past are just better – a classic example of this is of course the archives on this blog, but don’t take my word for it.  Dig deep into the archives, anything from 2005 & 2006 is much better reading than the droll pish I am currently dishing out.

I am of course a little bored at the moment.  The boss is on which means my work is at a minimum while all the other crew work their arses off. It will swing again when he is gone though – the crew will all disappear on holiday and i will spend a few months on my knees with my head lower than my arse trying to keep things running.

Still not sure where we go from here, Florida or Europe.  My money is on Europe for two reasons – it’s the sensible thing to do for the boat – and of course it puts me within a couple of hours plane ride of Ms. Bos – here’s hoping we find out soon.

Apart from that I have little more to report.  The house project has hit a stall as described in a previous post, the car repairs have more than stalled, they seem to have hit ‘the runners wall’ and I am just days away from contract expiry.  I have of course agreed to renew for an inflated fee.  A very large part of me regrets being sensible and buying that bloody diesel mondeo – i should have stuck my neck out and plumped for the V8R Jaguar instead and not worried about the fuel- infact, if the mondie need more spend, i feel a good hoof coming on and i will replace it with an old shitter for 500 quid instead.  That line of thinking never failed me before!

Enough for now

Bewildered – thats me, but we will get to that shortly

I did promise a short break in writing, but i have a 2 day gap to bring you up to speed.  For only the second time in my life, i succumbed to drugs recently.  Nothing sinister of course but two weeks ago i jumped off the boat and seriously hurt my back.  So bad was the pain that not only did I go to the hospital in St Barths but i also came away with a huge prescription AND filled it ! Anti inflamatries, two sets of pain killers and a muscle relaxant.  the latter of course caused me some concern, i was certain that taking them at night as i got into bed would lead to a huge pile of poo under the duvet at some point during the night.

I am pleased to say though – i am now well on the way to full recovery.

I do remain confused though – when sitting alone with laptop in front of me, watching a movie with head phones in – why the hell do people feel the need to talk to me? Is it not obvious that i am in my own private space, and that can be very hard to find on a 36 metre boat with 8 people on it. WHY – i just don’t get it. Or, better still, come and stand next to me, start watching the movie and talking to me at the same time – fuck wits !!

Good news on the boat front – the mate is leaving in a couple of weeks so i get a new roomie. WHy is that good news?  Well he is messy, smelly and noisey so no great loss there – and she is a lezza !!  Yeah, Dean you sex pest – that made you hard i know.

There is of course one thing better than sharing your room with a lezza – and that is sharing it with two !  But sadly there is only one on the boat.  Actually, sexuality aside, i do very much enjoy her company.  She is a no nonsense northern girl so the language can be frank and often blue but it is good to have someone to talk and joke with that will never misunderstand the banter as anything else but banter. Victoria – I salute you !

Of course, the crew have just arrived in the same bar as me – i sometimes wonder what i have to do to get uninterrupted time alone.  Maybe a little education for them wouldn’t go amiss. If i am sitting alone in a bar – i am doing so for a good reason. I want to be alone in a bar.  Shouting at me from your table on the terrace is embarrassing for us both – would you really expect me to interact?

Anyway – it will all be over soon – the big question is east or west – will we head to the states or to europe – i am hoping europe purely and simply to get back to belgium and see that woman of mine – its been a long time – too long in fact – to be truthful, i haven’t seen her this year and that just won’t do now will it.

So, silence for the next two weeks while the boss is here – then expect some news.  I see my ratings have dropped massively over the last few weeks but i can hardly blame you for that if there is nothing to read now can i ?

Oh – Californication……….sod all to do with the chili peppers.  its a tv series i have just been watching.  I was told it was about a sex addict but i fear the people that described it as that completely missed what it was really about, they need to watch it again.

Well lookie here – almost a thousand hits on my new blog thingy – Aren’t things going awfully well.  And what is really going to piss you all off is where i am right now, writing this entry.  Sitting nicely at anchor between St Kitts & Nevis !! You have to love modern technology.

Tomorrow we head to Antigua – not my favourite place in the world.  You may remember that last season i endured 4 months sitting in Antigua waiting and waiting and waiting, got so bored shitless with the place that i actually quit my job.

I am lucky i guess – i never expected to get time or internet access to be able to write here for a while.  I am still learning this new layout stuff and i do have some more modifications that i want to make but i need quiet time to do that but when it happens, expect a completely new theme yet again.  I am beginning to feel like the developers at facebook – always changing things, constantly – until i get it the way that i want but i am close now.

I have been reading the news today – amazing the course of democracy is taking around the world.  Tunisia, Egypt, Libya and i even heard a snifter from Morocco too.  It is all too easy for us westerners to complain about our politicians and our democratic system – of course it has flaws, its not perfect, and never will be because it is democratic – but would you take to the streets of your country and risk being shot dead to fight for it?  I doubt it!  I can’t imagine what it is like to live in a regime where that can happen – imagine the soldiers orders – shoot your people or we will shoot you – ring any bells ? Very similar to the Nazi regime of fear. Gaddafi will put up a big fight though, i have no doubt about that, there will be more bloodshed sadly – but in the end the people will win.

Maybe one fine day we will see North Korea also crumble into a democratic state instead of a brainwashed civilisation.

I am now missing europe quite badly and long to return home.  I know it may sound unbelievable to hear but i am sick and tired of the Caribbean.  In the last 4 years i have spent about a year here, many people would love the chance but it is just a bit too tacky, under developed, full of yachtie wankers for my liking. I even had a dream last night that my wicked mondeo was finally fixed and it had been fitted with a steering wheel like KIT has in Knight Rider – I was burning through some bends with the new engine fitted, pulling like 10 men, gripped with my new Firestones – then i also realised i had a Toyota Hi-Lux that had just been returned to me with a shite paint job.  Then strangely enough, i woke up!  Weird sometimes, the crap that flows through my head.

Still waiting for the finals on the new house – not sure what is going on at the moment, something about the building i have been using as my kitchen being illegal.  Normally, with illegal buildings in portugal, they make you pull them down – however in my case because i want to pull it down, they won’t let me.  Sometimes i wonder how such a stunning country can be inhabited by such backward people.  You would imagine that a completely legal build would be passed without delay so that the local economy can absorb my money.  Of course, i see their plan – they want a bribe, a back hander – so crooked is the Algarve.

Lets see what tomorrow brings

Finally, i made it !  I got the layout almost perfect and also the navigation just about cock on.  I would like to thank my ‘Happiness Engineer’ for their assistance.  Happiness Engineer is not some new slang term for anything kinky – it is simply the support dudes that help you when you have a problem.

Of course that leads me somewhere new.  Normally, online support can take a while, you kind of know that when you send that message, you ‘aint gonna get a reply – Happiness Engineers on the other hand, respond within 24 hours and in a language that you can understand.  Daryl – stand up and take a bow !!

I am now thinking that it was worth the cost to join up with these guys.  It’s good when things work out like that.

Does anyone know where Lexa is?  I haven’t heard from her in a while.

So my Caribbean antics for this year will soon draw to a close.  We have guests arriving next week and will be busy for the next 6 weeks so don’t expect too much from me.  Still waiting to find out where we will go from here.  There is a possibility that we will head to Florida to do some work before gently chugging across the Atlantic back to Europe.  A month in the States – that is surely going to piss Susan off thats for sure !

Saturday, I have a double dive planned before heading out on the town for what will be my last weekend off for 6 weeks.  Not sure what i will get up to but if Maj the Vaj has anything to do with it, it will be a late one.  Sunday will be my day of rest as it’s my turn to do ‘watch’ so expect a flurry of photos to hit the site then

So its all looking peachy!

Do you still have ‘bob a job’ week ?

And to be honest, i am glad i sold my ticket.  A 4 hour drive to get there, doors open at 8pm and a wait until 2am for the man to appear on stage.

If that wasn’t bad enough, for the first hour or so he played all new stuff which no-one knew.  It wasn’t until people started leaving that he realised the error of his ways and changed his tunes (excuse the pun).

Instead, i opted for a weekend of scuba – which ultimately thanks to Mr. Guetta also didn’t go exactly as planned.  After putting the tickets on his FB page, my phone went mental.  Once all the tickets were sold, i stopped answering the phone.  One persistent caller tried 10 times before i set the phone to automatically drop their calls.

Saturday morning i got up at 06:45, had a shave so that my mask sealed properly and then at 07:30 headed off with Maj the Vaj to the dive shop.  No-one there so went and had a coffee before returning 20 minutes later – still no-one there.  I called the contact number only to be told that diving was cancelled for saturday as there were not enough people.  They had tried to call me on friday night.  Turns out, the persistent caller that i blocked wasn’t after Guetta tickets at all, it was the dive shop trying to tell me i could sleep in as there was no diving.

Instead, i rented a car and Maj the Vaj and me headed to ‘La Parede’ for a potential surf session.  It wasn’t too bad, i rented a board and paddled out.  Only problem was, i think i was about 20 kilos too heavy for the board – every time i stood up, i buried the nose.  We stopped for lunch and then tried again – this time i grabbed a ‘foamy’, essentially a beginners board.  It had much more float but was an absolute bastard to turn so i ended up riding in a straight line on the white water.  All those years of surfing to end up exactly where i started!!

Sunday had better potential – a dive trip was on! 20 people on the boat – it sounded a bit hectic for me, and proved to be too. A group of 10 people with just 1 guide, shite visibility, nothing to see and yet again returning to the surface with half a tank of air.

The second dive went better – i did offer to help the guide by closing the group at the back but he wasn’t interested in my offer.  Yet again, surfacing with half a tank of air.

The highlight of the trip was in the cruise back in.  The captain spotted a pair of hump backs coming towards us in the shallow water.  We slowed up and got along side them, about 10 meters from their side – then they went tail up and dived away from us.

Thursday is drawing near, dropping our lines and heading back to St Maarten for a week until our next guests arrive.  Puerto Rico is a great place but i am now ready to move on – soon be back in Europe.

Sometimes life really can be an ‘Endless Summer’

Did you ever watch the A Team when you were a kid? Remember when howlin mad murdoch used to say ‘Dekker is coming’? well, thats how you have to say the title line……..Guetta is coming – to Puerto Rico…..aye aye aye aye yae! Got tickets for this coming saturday although i am not expecting much. see, normally, when you go to a gig (check me out – trendy or w

what a load of tosh – i typed loads, published it and all it posted is all you can see above, the rest gone forever and i can’t be arsed to do it all again – bollocks

Oh man !

I was right to be excited about coming here – this place is amazing. Blazing sun, crisp clear waters and very friendly locals.

We docked on Friday afternoon and as soon as we had cleared customs we were off – remember, we worked christmas day, boxing day and new years day so it was time for some overdue play time.

Friday night was easy – off to a local restaurant in Fajardo – immense! the sound of tree frogs singing all night long while we ate under a Gazebo in the garden.

Saturday, we rented a car and coast hopped along the north east coastline checking out the beaches and hang outs all the way up to San Juan, finally finding a place in the city where they had 4 poster beds on the beach – bliss!

On saturday night, instead of turning right and heading in the same direction, i decided to turn left and see what we could find.  I never would have believed how good a choice this would have been.  We hit a small village called somethng i forget. When we got there, it is fair to say we were all a little worried.  the streets were brimming with people, loud music and police with lights and sirens everywhere. Group decision and we decided to take the risk and stop.

The local village was having a beer marathon, a 24 hour extravaganza of beer, food and live music.  Our initial fears were swept away very quickly when the locals almost embraced us and encouraged us to join them in their party – it was completely mental – think nottinghill but latin and friendlier.  You coudn’t do this kind of thing in england – there would always be some pissed up twat that wanted to fight everyone. Even here – the english have a reputation of being hard drinkers.

We left at midnight, happy, content and exhausted.

Today was a shopping trip in San Juan, the capital. A huge shopping centre with over 300 stores all under one roof.  I was of course well chuffed in finding clothes that i actually liked and they fitted – better still, they met my tight arse budget – 4 pairs of jeans, 1 pair of shorts, 4 T shirts and 2 leather belts all for a little over 200 dollars – that little lot will last me for the next couple of years without a doubt.

Tomorrow its back to work – for the week anyway, next weekend i will be off again and hunt for some surf, this time i think all alone.  I may even risk some beach camping overnight.

Did i mention the Homeland Security guys that came on board to clear us in when we arrived?  Nice as pie, thats twice now – although they did tell me that i should get a new US visa – the current one was damaged by a leaking air con unit.  i have fixed the unit, now i need to fix the visa

life is good

Two entries in one day – Aren’t you the lucky ones.

I want to tell you about this, purely because i have heard so much bad stuff about these guys having a stinking attitude and being aggressive.  Two weeks ago on our way up to Turks and Caicos, we ventured into Puerto Rico’s territorial waters.  Nothing sinister – we were just passing by.

A local police boat picked us up and made us stop – telling us to wait for the customs – which of course we did.  Over the horizon, i noticed a very fast boat hammering towards us.  As they drew alongside, i noticed something that made my heart sink. A big sticker on the side of the boat ‘Department of Homeland Security’ – oh fuck!  I was convinced we were going to get a rough time, beaten sensless or even arse raped !

Then 2 more boats turned up – they were certainly mob handed and well armed. One of the crew members dared me to give a chorus of ‘America – Fuck Yeah’ but i figured if i did that, we could be stuck here for a few days.

Anyway – enough waffle.  They boarded us and what a pleasant bunch of chaps they were too – no hard arse, fuck you attitude, just doing their business with some pleasant banter thrown in – I am actually glad they came on board because they have completely shattered a misconception that modern media portrays of them.  In fact, now i want to go to America too !!!  Fuck Yeah !

God bless america !

Now, on a lighter note – we are heading back to Puerto rico this afternoon for a months lay over – does that make you jealous? I have always wanted to go there.  I do wonder though, if we encounter the DHS again, will they be as amicable ? – I am sure they will

Thankfully, i get to change my shirt today.  The old Team Gates was beginning to stink a bit.

Today it is firmly ‘Team Jobs’

Couldn’t access my email account on the pc, either with IE8 or Chrome, switched to the Mac, pulled my mail through to my collective email box and hey presto – email everywhere.  Thats a big thumbs up today for the Jobs crew.

I would like to wave a cautionary finger at them too though.  Free trial of mobileme?  put your credit card in first and get two months free.  At the end of 2 months, it automatically bills your card unless you cancel – should really be the other way around, suspend your account at the end of free trial and give you the option then to buy in – i was only after a @mac.com email address anyway

Anyway – for now NICE WORK TEAM JOBS!

(p.s. i like the silky smooth key strokes on my mac – not really a dig at gates as he doesn’t make his own)