Positive Mental Attitude

Don’t worry, I haven’t ben affected by one of those ‘life coaches’ or anything else pathetic like that but i have decided to perk myself up a little.  Lots going on at the moment and add to that a job that is getting a little long in the tooth and I have to say I have become way too grumpy for my own good, so I have decided to pick myself up every morning with a few american style ‘whoos’ at good volume, followed by the words ‘P-M-A dude’ and the occasional ‘fuck yeah’ to finish it off.

It makes me smile but annoys the shit out of those around me.  I even find myself saying it in the car when confronted with the local spanish fuckwits.  It works too – try it for yourself next time you want to rage at someone.

 

I have a few photos to share with you while I am PMA’ing.  Been flying an awful lot this last month.  I have sampled the delights of both Monarch Airlines and also the tedium of Ryanair.  Now Monarch, I really like.  The prices are not mental, their planes in good nick and their staff are always really good.  I was a bit miffed though the other week when crossing the Alps and the co-pilot came out of the cockpit to use the toilet.  Remember that German Wings flight that plunged into the Alps the other year?  Well, I thought that since then, all airlines had adopted a policy of always two people in the cockpit. Not Monarch it would seem.  As their customer service kindly pointed out to me in an email – the two at all times policy was a recommendation and not  law so they weren’t doing it.  So I switched to Ryanair.  A little cheaper, a little less classy and a little less on time.  Both of last weeks flights were at least an hour late, the return leg getting to an hour and a half behind.

I am a firm subscriber to the notion of ‘better late than never’ when flying.  Ryanair play that shite little fanfare when they land on time or ahead of schedule – you may have noticed.  What you also may have noticed is that they also publish longer flight times than their rivals for identical flights – sneaky feckers aren’t they?

So this time – no fanfare, praise the lord but as you can see below, a late departure and then to add insult to injury, we get overtaken by an Easyjet plane – damn Ryanair you tight fuckers, burn some extra fuel and catch up some of the time you lost!

IMG_0491

 

Now, all said and done, lets talk about Range Rover Sport and the Land Rover Dealer network.  Been a thorn in my side for a while now, whenever I take my car to the dealer, it costs a grand.  Never more, never less, always a fecking grand.  I called them last week to make a booking to have some work done.  One of the things I asked them to do was tell me how much a new key would be.  One of my keys is worn badly on the unlock button.  So bad the casing has cracked and is exposing the electronics to the atmosphere.  I asked for a price and the rather smug fucker at the dealer said, ……wait for it……….£250 – I was gob smacked.

£250 for a key – get lost !.  I scoured eBay and found a new shell.  All I had to do was cut the old unit apart, remove the electronics and fit them inside the new key – easy !!!IMG_0499

 

Damn right it was easy – for a first timer, it took me about 20 minutes.  Comparing the two keys (genuine and aftermarket) it is hard to see the difference, in fact, I think the new one is better

IMG_0500

And here’s the best bit – not £250 like the Dick Turpin dealer wanted, no.  A modest £5.95 delivered from eBay.  Yes, not a typo, five pounds and ninety five pence, delivered in two days flat – job done

My Range Rover is ace – the dealer network is just shite.

 

Now tonight, I would like to end with a little bit of nostalgia.  Some of you may be familiar with a spectacularly good program called ‘Modern Family’. It’s ace isn’t it ?  One of the main characters on that program is a guy I know better as Al Bundy from Married with Children ( also showing the extremely hot young Christina Applegate).  A superb comedy from a time before the politically correct brigade gained some seats in the Houses of Parliament. Anyway, tonight I found a montage of Al Bundys best insults and it actually made me LOL so I thought I should share.  I genuinely did LOL too, I am not just typing that for effect – I LOL’d and you will too, I promise

http://www.ebaumsworld.com/videos/al-bundys-best-insults/84992638/


Have a moan - the beers are on me !!

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