God bless these fashionistas !
So last night, after watching the sunset on the western tip of the island, i cycled for home good and hard. In general terms, good and hard means with little or no consideration for the local laws – I prefer it that way.
On my very last leg, I happened across Nantuckets equivalent of a CSO – or community support officer – generally considered wanna be coppers that couldn´t quite make the grade.
“Sir, Sir – Are you aware you are travelling the wrong way with your light flashing?” he yelled at me as I sped across the cobbles á toute grande vitesse`as they might say in France.
At this point – several responses flashed into my mind
1. Are you aware you are exceeding the weight limit for your belt?
2. Oh really? I thought all of the cars were going the wrong way!
3. I am sorry – I don’t speak American old chap! (of course this would have been in my best British accent!)
Of course, not wanting to get into a confrontation with the rotund little beggar, I simply replied – ‘Yes, indeed I am’.
It’s time to head back to Newport again, racing at the weekend – if you can call it racing. This big old bus is about 3 times the size of an Americas Cup boat and around 20 times slower. I also seem to have completely knackered the rear wheel bearings in my very bloody expensive bike – so the theory of buying expensive and lasting longer is right out of the window – unless of course the shop changes it on warranty, we shall know by wednesday
The babies and horses gallery is now officially closed – I am pleased to say that, as expected, I got exactly the kind of shite that I had hoped for. I am open for ideas for something new, something fresh, something a little bit different.
Answers on a post card please
August 22nd, 2012 at 16:35
I am so disappointed at the retorts you dream t up, you should have used:- a) I’ll turn the light of then ! b) who are you? and what are you doing in my bedroom? and the all time classic c) honestly, you have nothing better to do? But seriously as a fellow law enforcement officer, i would have to point out, taking the mickey out a small rotund intellectually challenged officer is not on, remember it’s not big and it’s not clever!!