I figured something out yesterday.  I often wondered why so many people in England wash their cars on Sundays……….it’s because they are bored shitless and there is nothing else for them to do.


I have been sick now for 5 days and yesterday I decided to clean my car in the solitude of my own garden.  Those that know me well, will realise just how bored I was to do this.


First, I vacuumed it out.  This is something I don’t ever remember doing in the three years that I have owned this car.  I am now expecting improved acceleration, fuel economy and top speed after removing around 5kgs of sand and gravel ballast from the carpets and seats.


I also found 2.85€ that I never knew I had, so with this new found fortune, I took a trip to the jet wash and hosed it all down.  I am sure the locals considered me crazy as I opened the doors and tailgate and hosed down around the door casings and door frames.


I was so astounded at how good it was beginning to look that then I went to Lidl and bought some window cleaner.


It’s been a real bastard having a Lidl so close to home.  I always come out with some special offer tools under my arm – yesterday was no exception.  I paid 10€ for a tap and die set from M3 upto M12, including an MPT taper tap – I haven’t even seen one of those in years.  Ok, I am sure it won’t last long but I I get just ½ an hour work out of it, then I feel it would have paid for itself anyway.


The windows were bad – so bad infact that I had to at least double clean each one in turn, some even took a third clean to finish them off.


I did find my missing running shoe under the front passenger seat though, I was quite chuffed about that.


Late on Saturday night, I couldn’t sleep so I got up and watched some of the Olympics on TV.  I was in time to watch the ladies marathon.  I missed the start by around 20 minutes and sat watching for around 10 minutes.  After those long ten minutes, I again realised how boring a marathon was to watch.  Ok, maybe the start might give some excitement (maybe) and the end a little more but the 2 ½ hours in between is complete tosh.  Despite the local camera crews trying to get some new angles on the race – it just didn’t do it for me – so I started flicking.


I came across an old Robert DeNiro film.  I say old because he must have still been in his 20’s, at a push , early thirties.  The film was weird so I watched it.  Cameo appearances from Harvey Keitel as a pimp, Martin Scorscese ( I hope I spelt that right) a very young Cybil Shepard (if you remember ‘Moonlighting’ ) and an even younger Jodie Foster – sporting her original nose of course.


The film finished and I still had no idea what was going on – so I went to bed.



Always remember – Déjà vu is just a glitch in the Matrix




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Have a moan - the beers are on me !!

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