palma-ised

 
i heard this word tonight and it kinda sums up what palma does to the young and influencial yachting fraternity.
 
Palma as a city is a great place, and remember, i say this when i live in the middle of a national park in the middle of nowhere in portugal!
 
it is a great place but it takes it toll. There are three things that are plentiful in palma.
 
1. dog shit on the streets.
 
ok, things have improved of late, with the fine for fouling doubled last month, i now see more people picking up their dog doo than i do leave it behind, something of a quantum shift! these streets used to be a litteral shit hole, only one place worse that i know of, Valencia!
 
2. hedonistic attitudes towards casual sex
 
Maybe because it is a holiday island but i have never seen so much free for all shagging in one place, everyone seems to be at it, with as many pieces as possible, married or single, it doesnt matter, if ever a phrase was perfect for an island, every hole is a goal  seems to have been made up by someone from palma. A german friend of mine from the black forrest once nick named this place pussy island. he wasnt wrong. I do think though the attitude of free love is helped along massively by
 
3. an uncontrolled amount of readily available coke and pills.
 
whatever you want, is openly peddled on the streets. you can see the gypsies peddling form their push chairs in the court yards. a couple of months ago, the chief of police was discharged after it was proved that he was in cahoots with the local drug barons. i have seen many people come here clean and green but then plunge into the depths of nothing more than being a solid coke head and quickly their lives dissappear as they enter the vicious circle of being too drug fucked to get out of bed to go to work.
 
 
so once again i leave palma, well at midday tomorrow to be precise. my departure was perfectly timed so that i should arrive in portugal at home as the sun rises on sunday morning, just in time for a sunrise surf session. Yep, planned to perfection, thats as hedonistic as i get!
 
so here comes the summer. think of me while you are working your asses off, i will be doing bugger all except beach and surf until early september when i will be heading to norway to join my next boat. so by the time i hit inglaterra at the end of september i will be perfectly tanned, taking on my adonis like physique, there to woo and frustrate the local english chicks.
 
so tomorrow at around 7pm local time (6pm UK) i will be arriving in valencia and beginning my 1000 kms treck across southern spain, andalucia and the algarve until i get home at around 5am uk time. then i will unpack, grab my boards and head out to tonel as my first beach of choice, then mareta. if there is nothing to be found at either of them, a quick sprint northward up the west coast and i will find myself at the mighty praia do armado , where , you can bet your sweet ass there will be a wave and a small hippy commune.
 
somewhere in my bags is one block of surf wax, i will paste up the groovey and the long board and head out. once the session is finished, bubble lounge is waiting, then , buy some new wax and paste up the boards ready for the sunday evening sessions if i am still awake
 
so, next time you hear from me, i will be home in portugal and once again, only available on my portuguese phone number. if you dont have it, you can view my profile and contact card at the top left of this page.
 
ate a proxima
 
 
 
authors footnote – the author would like to thank dan the man *kiwi* for enlightening me on the phrase palma-ised tonight while i was having a beer in the tavarua, all credit for that headline goes to him
 
 
 

One response to “palma-ised

  • lexa

    we callo it sex wax here, thats how great the surf is in SA!! enjoy the road trip and all those waves,  have a blast!! xx

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