the human slug

 
ok, tonight i feel compelled to write.  I sat at home this evening having something to eat and watching tv. Newsround came on.  When i was a kid it was called John Cravens news round but today it is just as wholesome. I like watching that news because it doesnt try to be dramatic or embelish, it is a little more real, a bit like a few years ago when i worked in the smoke with the big jobs, i would get to work and all the toffs would be talking about the latest share crisis or merger talks that they had seen on the news that morning – me, i much prefer to start the day with a big yellow bird, bert and ernie, the cookie monster or if lucky – the count!!
 
anyway, i wandered a bit then, let me get to the point, tonights leading story on newsround!!!
 
14 year old girl bullied at school because of the way she looks!  too afraid to return for fear of more bullying.
 
Now, maybe like me, in recent years, you think bullying has been over exagerated a little, ok sometimes it does happen but other times it is just kids being kids. Anyway, this 14 year old girl that was being bullied for the way she looks is 20 stone – yes twenty stone, i did not type that wrong.
 
let me put that into persepctive for you – at fourteen years old, she is 33% heavier than me, remember, i stand over six feet tall and have a heavy frame but this little porker would squash me flat. But she has been dieting – since christmas she has lost 5 pounds – yep , five whole pounds!!!! lets say thats half a pound a week – most of you reading this will probably crap that much each day!!! i certainly do.
 
While being interviewed, what do you think she was doing?  TAKE A WILD GUESS!!
 
playing a playstation portable.  Yep, the fat little knacker was content doing fuck all but stuffing her fat little cheeks and then excercising her thumbs until her hearts content.  Does she wonder why she is excessively overweight?
 
to add further pamper to this little porker, the local council had taken pity on her and started paying for home tutors so that she wouldnt even have to walk to school or to the bus stop!!! what is wrong with these people???
 
i remember once actually getting up to seventeen and a half stone myself and thinking what a fat twat i had become and i did something about it. Imagine if i had said to myself – oh i am getting a bit lardy – i will do something about it when i get to twenty stones!!!
 
ok fatties , listen up.  it is like this – if you eat shit and/or do bugger all excercise – you will get fat. no-one else to blame except yourself (although in this case i think the parents should bend over and take a good fisting). you can tell me that you have issues/illnesses but i just aint gonna buy it.  as my good friend alex told me once – how many fat people do you see in africa where food is scarce and they have to work hard to get it? the answer – zero, none, nada, zilch. run at a calorie deficit and you will not be fat – calorie overload and you will be one hell of a beast that sweats a lot on a hot day
 
bollocks to political correctness – I am all for good old fashioned common sense, just like my granma would say!

2 responses to “the human slug

Have a moan - the beers are on me !!

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